Tuesday, October 22, 2013

My Roommate Bought A Hat With The Word "Bitch" On It


I'm new to the hat wearing world, as you're probably all familiar with by now. Hats are great, hats are fun, and they're celebrated strongly on two different Sundays in our world country (Easter and The Kentucky Derby). I have no beefs with hats, only the hat wearer. This was something I never thought of, until of course I saw that my roommate bought a winter hat, like a beanie (but not this kind of beanie), that just says the word "bitch" on it. Well actually it says "BITCH" which is even more hostile, when you think about it.

I have questions surrounding this hat, none that I would seriously ever ask him (partly because we've lived together for something like 10 weeks now and haven't even accumulated up to three minutes of talking to one another; COLLEGE EVERYONE!).

I guess the thing puzzling me most is has the.....reputation of the word "bitch" or "BITCH" changed without me knowing? If it has, I guess that'd be a positive thing. Being the gentleman that I am, it isn't exactly exuberant in my daily vocabulary. (Unless, ya know I'm talking to my brother on the phone and he says "eh I gotta go to bed" and it's 10:15, then yeh, I'll call him that. Because he's acting like one. A little one! Gah! I'm just getting so angry thinking about it! Or if my mom's telling me about someone and calls her a "witch" and at which point I courageously say "Mom, just say bitch" and then we laugh or I get scolded.)

After writing it so many times and just hearing it in my head, it's a pretty nasty word. Which is why I'm confused as to why someone would purchase a hat that says "BITCH" on it. So yeh, that's my second question: why would you buy a hat or really anything that says "bitch" or "BITCH" on it? Am I just being a curmudgeon right now? No, because if I were being a true curmudgeon I'd be more surely and throwing around "bitch" more often and probably some f-words. Like fuck*. Plus, I think the word "bitch" can be used for good. Two of my favorite shows immediately come to mind when I hear it:





Hilarious! My roommate's hat? Not hilarious. Well it makes me laugh, but I don't think that was the specific goal American Apparel had when it designed the hat. Wait a sec. What design!? It's just a black beanie with a patch sewn into it that says "BITCH" on it! Maybe it's the laziness that's making me mad? Or maybe I'm just too sensitive to the subject. Maybe I'm..... the bitch.


Nope. It's just a stupid hat. I hope you've enjoyed this brief commentary that'd probably make more of an impact when the word was making it's way into humanity however many years ago. So thanks everyone. And remember don't buy stupid hats.










































*it was fuck

1 comment:

Brian said...

This line cracked me up:
Or if my mom's telling me about someone and calls her a "witch" and at which point I courageously say "Mom, just say bitch" and then we laugh or I get scolded.)